Missing Fully-Booked

#157: Missing Friends

I was giddy all morning at the thought of having the whole afternoon free. Free to fly off to Bondi Junction and get myself one book I've been waiting to come out for some time. I was able to drag my Indonesian friend, Rini, by telling her that she can review her Organizational Behavior (or shall I say Organisational Behaviour?) notes while I'm book-hunting. (Yeah right. Who ever gets to do schoolwork in a mall?)

I almost flew out of the bus in excitement. I mean, Fully-Booked in little old Philippines gets their stock almost the same time they are released in the US. Borders will have the book. They should. Or they should close down.

Surprise, surprise. The biggest bookstore in Westfield (their version of our SMs) doesn't have it. Does not know even when they will have stocks. Goodness. This is an Australian author we're talking about. How could the book be available across the US and not be available in the author's homeland? (Note the generalization that Borders, Westfield in Bondi Junction represents the whole country.) I wanted to stab the guy behind the counter. Stab him with a drinking straw. (I'm no killer.)

Thank goodness I had so much leftover "happiness" from yesterday. Feb 8 goes down as one of my favorite days.

In the morning, we had the head of Strategic Planning of Leo Burnett talk to us about his job. Really cool guy. Who would've thought that with his funky "Go Green" shirt, tattered jeans and youngish (i.e. late 20's) looks, he's some bigshot executive in his firm. 10 years ago, he got his MBA degree from AGSM and at the last moment, while waiting for his final interview with McKinsey in New York, he suddenly walks out and says that he doesn't want to do Consulting. (Okay, it was triggered by this McKinsey guy who walked out of the elevator and declared to him that McKinsey ruined his life.) And so he headed down the path of Strategic Planning for an Advertising Agency... a job which he still loves up to now. When was the last time you talked to a person who's so enthusiastic about his job he sounds like he would have married it if that were constitutionally possible.

After that talk, we headed off to this Presentation Skills workshop which I didn't learn much from but which I really enjoyed because I made this silly presentation about a fictional business offering fictional services involving makeovers of "clueless" men. If there's Queer Eye for the Straight Guy, here's my Diva for the Dork. The class embraced the idea and I still get a laugh out of reading the stuff I wrote on the slides (stuff I wrote at 3am that same day.)

In the evening, someone from church picked me up for the Bible study. Boy, was his car clean. I mean, I was afraid to move lest I unsettle some hidden dust particles. Very very neat. Which is good. (Ok, my car back home was a mess in that my brother and dad would always pound me for having too much stuff BUT it wasn't filthy. Plus, my friend Teej said, "the prettier the girl, the messier the car." I believe that. So I keep on messing it up so I get some form of affirmation, no matter how misguided. But guys are different. They should have clean cars. The cleaner the car, the cooler the guy. I think. I remember my friend Gerard who used to give me a lift from time to time. His trunk is the most organized place on earth. You see his shoes lined up like a bunch of army guys holding a salute even after going through a winding road up some mountain. He has plastic containers for his other stuff so that everything fits like Lego. The inside is spotless. Not even a thumbmark. CSI would have a hard time getting any form of evidence from there.) But I digress. The point is, it was good to meet yet another set of charming people. The network just grows and grows and I'm glad. I already have a camping trip invitation for two weeks from now. Another invitation for a soccer game. Another option for a day at Bronte Beach. All good.

I was making a mental list of all the friends I've made so far - people I've personally allowed to transition from being mere faces to potential friends, but while they make me smile, they also remind me of the good friends I've left behind. I miss them terribly. All these activities, in my mind, would be best enjoyed if so and so were here or if this friend or that set of friends from back home could just be part of them.

Just this afternoon, I read a review about "Lady Vengeance" and I already knew the set of friends who would've gladly gone with me to watch it. Raise your hands, all you who enjoyed Vanilla Sky and Kill Bill. I wander inside a bookstore and I half-expect one of my friends to just be around the next shelf, ready to hear how amazing this cool new book I'm holding is. I walk past cafes and I know just which of my friends would be willing to spend hours with me there.

I guess I am having a less-than-easy time handling the huge influx of new people in my life. I've always surrounded myself with people, my good friend Jus correctly observed. Thing is, these are people I've collected carefully, and one by one over the years. It's quite a different thing to see yourself surrounded by many people with whom you have very weak affiliations. Activities abound but deep ties are rare, if at all, existent. I am almost forced to break down my self-erected walls at a rate that I'm not too adept at managing yet. I need the walls. They keep me safe.

I also need to stop rambling. To keep you sane.
And so this entry ends like Parokya ni Edgar's "Yes-Yes Show."

Borders should close down.